Delusion?
At 5:30 AM
I woke up
With the big kid
Who accidentally
Stepped on the white noise machine
In our room
And sent it tumbling
Waking everyone
But my husband
Who has decided
To sleep upstairs
To “intercept” said big kid
Before he decides
To come downstairs
And wake us up
At an ungodly hour—
The only hour
My children wake at.
But my husband slept in
Cosy upstairs
(Where was the interception, honey?!)
While I took the kids
Downstairs
For breakfast
And did the school prep stuff
And was either so tired
Or actually making sense
(HIGHLY questionable)
That I asked
ChatGPT
to turn the
Mesmerizing pattern
Of my high fiber cereal
Into a piece of art
Displayed in the MoMA:
Nothing else
I’d like to add
To my brainless post
About how my day started.
The rest of the day
Felt like interval training
For motherhood.
I woke up
From a short nap
With mascara
Under my eyes
And spoke to someone
Face to face
Before realizing
I also had
A crease
From my pillow
On my forehead.
I ran upstairs
And tried to Gua Sha
It off
Before the next person came along
Thinking
Gee
Emily looks like
She could use some rest
(At least!).
I can’t wait
To share photos with you
Where I’m not in athleisure
Covered in guacamole
And blue Gatorade
And quesadilla shmutz
(At least put me in a white button down with those things—like a chic mess!)
But this is all I got:
Took the kids
To the driving range
With a best friend
From high school
Who doesn’t care
What I’m wearing
Who held the baby
So I could take a whack
Who cheers me
To the end of the week
When I needed
A GOOD LAUGH
And kept a watchful eye
That our boys
Didn’t jump off
The top deck
Of the driving range 😩
And that it was just a shoe
Thrown over the top
Onto the green below
To see if the ball finder
Would track
How far
A shoe was thrown.
Somedays I wonder what I’m doing with my life—especially rereading this post. Send help. 😂😂😂😂😂🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
One day, I’ll look back and say, I can’t believe I got to do that! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I wish I joined, looks fun