Learning From The Light and Dark
Darkness and light are both part of the Whole. We can learn so much from each if we're brave enough to explore both paths.
I've listened to Barbara Brown Taylor, bestselling author, teacher, and spiritual contrarian, on several podcasts. Most notably, on my favorite podcast, Krista Tippett's, On Being. Barbara's contrarian, nature-forward philosophy on finding God in every moment, even in a grain of sand, resonates deeply with me.
I'm now reading one of her books, "An Altar in the World," on how to see the holy in everything. At the same time, I'm listening to another one of her books, "Learning to Walk in the Dark," on casting aside our fears of darkness and learning from the corners of our lives that have gone unexplored, unmapped, or unanswered.
As I listened to Barbara talk about her next project in life, after writing so many best-sellers, she said:
"My project right now is not to have a project. There comes a time in life when one should lean into the old adage of being instead of doing. But it doesn't get you much respect in the world. So what's next for me is pursuing a biblical concept of the Sabbath. What does it mean to rest in the presence of God and not to earn my keep? That seems like a worthy project."
While Barbara was talking about being, rest, and retirement, it inspires me to think about what it means to apply that trust (and rest) in the presence of God into my everyday.
It makes me wonder:
Can I trust myself more than I try to control?
Can I trust that I am perfectly created, and good enough, exactly the way I am, and I can show up as I am, anywhere, comfortably, without the pressure of pleasing?
Can I trust that I am in the exact season of life that's meant for me, without comparing?
Can I trust my gut and intuition and follow it, without asking everyone for their advice?
Can I believe in myself--even in times when I feel stuck, stagnant, or unproductive--the way that God (the Stars--whatever fills in your blank) has believed in me from the moment I was created?
For me, resting in the presence of God feels like trusting myself. I wish I could tell you, "Here are the three ways I became more trusting of myself," but I've acquired it only through life's experiences--the light and the dark. All of my experiences have given me a robust understanding of what it means--and how powerful it is--to trust myself and my path...and also what it means to take the risk of trusting others and Divine timing.
What I'm not saying is, "Don't trust others."
What I am saying is that you're probably more right than you think you are. Notice when you second guess yourself, or feel "less than," and ask yourself some of these questions. Darkness and light are both part of the Whole. We can learn so much from each if we're brave enough to explore both paths.
*A note on trust: Both experiences over time and safety are important precursors to trust. Trust is a privilege that some people may not be ready for.