Uploading 121 photos

I’m uploading photos

To our digital frame

And I’m looking at myself

And my family

Just the other day

And realize

(Again and again and again and again…)

How special the time is

With my children

And my family

I see the way they look at me

And hug me

In photos

We are their world

Being a mother is the most noble job

And perspective

Going through old photos

Or photos from just the other day

Can be just the dose

Of perspective

To get you through

The long days

And nights

Of teething

And colds

And children crawling into your bed at 1 AM

It’s weird

Like

We have enough children

But it never feels like enough

I grieve when I think about

How these moments will pass

My children will grow old

I will grow older…

I’m a “stay at home mom”—

But really I get out a lot!—

And still…

I don’t have enough time

With my children

(Or family)

And sometimes it’s too much

(You know how that goes—

“Mom! mom! Mom! Mom! Look at this! Watch this!”)

But most of the time

I feel like life is one of those unfair beach toys

That scoops up the sand

But has holes in the bottom

Where the sand always runs out.

It’s a weird feeling

To watch the sand

Of our life memories

run through the sieve of time

It makes every moment

All the more special—

But really special feels like a lowly word

For how important each iota

Of this gift of life is—

Divine…

Heaven…

Those work.